Saturday, May 09, 2009

Online dating sites, I am discovering, are blogging gold.

Here's what the latest gem who contacted me has written in his profile...

"Hi..Im new tro this kind of thing...I would be interested in hearing from classy,sexy,sophisticated,educat ed,lawyers,doctors or spontaneous ladies. You have to wear great clothes and look your very best..Did you know that most men don't know how to describe what they want in a lady..Please get in touch...!!!!"

HAHAHA! This guy doesn't want a person, he wants a Stepford escort. AND we're supposed to thank him because he's sooo smart and "know(s) how to describe what (he) want(s) in a lady..."

Yes, sir. I did in fact know that many men are inarticulate. And some of you are very, very shallow, and to make you even more unattractive, are also lacking the insight to recognize when you are wearing your shallowness like a shining crown. and make even the most feeble attempt to hide the fact. Some of you don't type very well, nor can you proofread, either.

That spontaneous enough for you, buddy?


Blogger Pseudonymph said...

Was there anything on there about 'Must be Canadian citizen, and not averse to quickie marriage for relocation purposes'?

May 9, 2009 at 6:43 a.m.  
Anonymous Erin said...

I've never tried a dating site (you know how tech savvy I am - oh wait, and single too, go figure), but I have taken a look at some of them and there's no denying the possible entertainment value. I think your assessment of them as a blogging gold mine is correct, and will keep you writing for a very long time.

You have to keep us posted. Maybe give the week's highlights of:

-badly written
-the ones where they say they're 30, but really they look about 50 (and of course their looking for women 18 to 25)

And so on. :)

Pseudonymph - I AM a Canadian citizen, and might be available for a quickie marriage for relocation purposes. But he has to be educated, classy, sexy, sophisticated and look his very best. Got any of those hanging around?

May 9, 2009 at 11:00 a.m.  
Blogger Pseudonymph said...

Yeah, but you'll have to wait till he grows up, finishes high school and leaves home ;-)
He's his mother's son!

May 9, 2009 at 11:25 p.m.  
Anonymous Erin said...

Oh dear. Maybe you should just send him to camp?

May 10, 2009 at 10:29 a.m.  
Blogger Pseudonymph said...

Erin - camp. Means something different over here. ie camp as a row of tents

May 10, 2009 at 7:57 p.m.  
Blogger dawna said...

ha! I was on one of the free fishy site myself. I couldn't keep some of the gems to myself so had to share them with another single friend of mine who couldn't be bothered with the online dating sites (and I didn't do the cause any good with forwarding her all the "winners").

I've since deleted my profile...can't take the insincerity & downright dishonesty anymore.

and I shudder to think how inbred the cesspool has become as I still have friends on the site and still hear the stories.

sorry for that imagery, lol

May 22, 2009 at 9:53 p.m.  
Blogger dawna said...

Well crafted reply of yours, BTW.

Would give us some laughs if you continue to post the golden ones...

May 22, 2009 at 9:54 p.m.  
Blogger The Wrath of Dawn said...

Yeah, it was too depressing. I didn't actually send that reply, though. I just saved it for posterity here, where it would be appreciated.

Did the free fishy, too, and it was also a font of losers and freaks. I have a friend who actually met a lovely man there, so it can be done, but I don't think I have that kind of patience.

May 23, 2009 at 12:40 a.m.  

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