Tuesday, February 15, 2011

STOP CONTACTING THOSE PEOPLE!!!

I must pass along to you some most valuable advice. I have received what has to be the most truly altruistic communication of my life from one Mrs. Elizabeth Rose Jones, who has, I am sure, only my best interests at heart, and now I pass this wisdom on to you.

It had the compelling subject line, STOP CONTACTING THOSE PEOPLE!!!

And proceeded as follows:

Attn: My Dear,

I am Mrs Elizabeth Rose Jones, I am a US citizen, 48 years Old. I reside here in Silver Springs Florida. My residential address is as follows. 7008 E Hwy 326 Silver Springs FLorida 34488, United States, am thinking of relocating since I am now rich. I am one of those that took part in the Compensation in Nigeria many years ago and they refused to pay me, I had paid over US$20,000 while in the US, trying to get my payment all to no avail.

So I decided to travel down to Nigeria with all my compensation documents, And I was directed to meet Barrister James Rotimi, who is the member of COMPENSATION AWARD COMMITTEE, and I contacted him and he explained everything to me. He said whoever is contacting us through emails are fake.

He took me to the paying bank for the claim of my Compensation payment. Right now I am the most happiest woman on earth because I have received my compensation funds of $1,500,000.00 Moreover, Barrister James Rotimi, showed me the full information of those that are yet to receive their payments and I saw your email address as one of the beneficiaries, that is why I decided to email you to stop dealing with those people, they are not with your fund, they are only making money out of you. I will advise you to contact Barrister James Rotimi.

You have to contact him directly on this information below.

COMPENSATION AWARD HOUSE
Name : Barrister James Rotimi (Esq)
Email: barristerjamesrotimi@mail.kz
Phone Number: +234-808-454-4787.

You really have to stop dealing with those people that are contacting you and telling you that your fund is with them, it is not in anyway with them, they are only taking advantage of you and they will dry you up until you have nothing.

The only money I paid after I met Barrister James Rotimi was just US$580 for the paper works, take note of that.

Once again stop contacting those people, I will advise you to contact Barrister James Rotimi so that he can help you to Deliver your fund instead of dealing with those liars that will be turning you around asking for different kind of money to complete your transaction.

Thank You and Be Blessed.

Mrs Elizabeth Rose Jones

-----------------

I am, Mrs. Jones. I am. And I have the utmost confidence that taking the advice of someone who would spend $20,000 trying to retrieve money from Nigeria would be a wise decision on my part. Also, I derive great comfort from the COMPENSATION AWARDS COMMITTEE being capitalized. If it appears in ALL CAPS it must be so, for no one would type in ALL CAPS if they were making anything up, would they? That has soothed any doubts I might have and convinced me throughly of its veracity.

Be blessed, Mrs. Jones. Be blessed. I must say, you're using a better class of interpreter these days.

6 Comments:

Blogger Amanda Huggenkiss said...

I refuse to send them all my money until they come up with a better story than that.

e.g.

Hello,

I am William Arthur Philip Louis Wales. How lovely to meet you. Have you come far?
I am getting married in the near future and I am unsure if my scrummy fiancée is truly in love with me, or in love with my hot and cold running money, country estates and footmen.
To test her love I am after somebody to mind my ship loads of dosh for a bit. I will see if she still fancies me when I am skint.
If you can help by minding my piles for a bit then please send me your bank details and I will get one of my chinless wonder flunkies in my Nigerian office to fix things up.

What-O,

Yours etc, etc,

Prince Willy

February 16, 2011 at 7:42 a.m.  
Blogger Erin said...

Don't believe their lies, believe mine!

That's an interesting take on things. I wonder why some scammer hasn't thought of this sooner.

February 16, 2011 at 8:06 a.m.  
Blogger Pearl said...

Would you believe that when I was first e-mailed with the Nigerian scam (back in 1982) that I contacted the FBI?! :-) I felt they should know.

That's me -- right on top of things!

Pearl

February 16, 2011 at 6:38 p.m.  
Blogger WrathofDawn said...

LOL @ Amanda! " How lovely to meet you. Have you come far?" indeed!

@ Erin - I know! It seems the obvious 2nd wave, doesn't it?

@ Pearl - I would expect nothing less. Nor would the FBI.

February 16, 2011 at 10:21 p.m.  
Blogger Aled Hughes said...

At the request of the 'investigative journalists' of a British 'tabloid' (if it's a crap paper aimed at the masses, it's a tabloid, otherwise it's a newspaper...) I 'indulged' a Michael from South London. I even got him to send me a cashier's check for $6,000. I duly presented this to my bank, but it was 6 weeks before they bounced it! It was drawn on the Bank of Alaska. Should have asked her.... Trouble was that Michael was not best pleased and sent some lunatic from Jacksonville to pay me a visit. Said lunatic is still in Marion County Jail.... and I'm still without my $1.5 mill let alone the $6K.

February 16, 2011 at 11:43 p.m.  
Blogger Richard Wintle said...

Mrs. Elizabeth Rose Jones has either deemed the likelihood of suckering me to be too low, or has been captured in corporate spam-traps.

However, I do get emails from people telling me that they make hundreds of dollars a day filling out online surveys. Now *that* seems totally plausible. I'm in!

February 20, 2011 at 12:04 p.m.  

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